Workshops

Professional Relationships

Two Arrows Meeting in Mid-Air: Embracing Conflict As Teacher & Guide

Whether the felt emotion is anger, frustration, impatience or sadness, identifying the underlying causes of conflict is a necessary first step toward understanding its value. A perceived lack of respect, not being heard, perceived incompetence on the part of another, financial differences, political differences — just a few of conflict’s resting places. The focus is on understanding and accepting one’s unique “style” of response to conflictual situations and people and learning how to shape that style for maximum mutual advantage. Conflict management is explored using story, role-play and case vignettes with emphasis on learning to manage conflict rather than merely resolving it.

Communication

The ideal that co-workers ought to function as a “team” is fraught with obstacles, most of which, at base, are personal and relational.  Common causes of breakdown in communication are explored: emotion-laden first responses such as a lack of impulse control, impatience, intolerance, or anger can impede communication in high-stress situations.  Methods are offered for guiding communication away from personal impact and refocusing on the topic or theme; keeping interactions focused on forward movement while at once honoring the personal impact that words and personalities have. Common underlying psychological contributors to communication problems are identified, including negative self-talk threads and the belief that individual worth is tied to performance.

Isolation in Life & Work

For many leaders the most natural response to stress or challenge is to isolate, whether consciously or unconsciously.  Isolation from significant others and from one’s peers may seem like good professional insurance, i.e., I can’t let anyone see that I’m vulnerable, feeling disempowered, or that I’m human.  The focus is on why we isolate, and how the creation of a village of our own kind can enhance our professional and personal lives. Emphasis is on how to build safe relationships with others, the meaning of trust, and highlighting the universal need for camaraderie and community among fellow leaders.

The Myth of a Balanced Life

Many Leaders strive for the infamous work-life balance, seeking equilibrium between work, family, hobbies and other interests.  However, due to the unique requirements of a Leader, many find themselves living life on the fringes, in extremes, rather than in a seemingly mythical center of a balanced existence.  Is balance a possibility or a myth?  What does it mean, what does it look like, and can it be achieved?  Pursuing balance can be a stressor in itself, and learning to relinquish control, while living more fully in the moment can contribute to contentment, whether or not the allusive balance is achieved.

Self-Care

Chronic Fatigue Syndrome of the Soul

How to move from a life that seems out of control to one that includes an appreciation for one’s limitations and one’s own need for renewal.  The emphasis is on prevention by way of (a) identifying the triggers that set the context for anxiety and (b) offering effective “tools” for managing common symptoms.

Slowing Down in a Hurry-Up World: Identifying the Obstacles to Realistic Self-Care

The most notorious obstacles to effective self-care are the things that seem to possess or “own” us, for example, the need to “stay busy” can be an owner, or the desire for prestige, position, acknowledgement, or control.  Additionally, if we require perfection of ourselves or of others, or if we are intolerant of others, or if we live with low-grade anger or unresolved unforgiveness —these, too, can own us. Naming the obstacles, or the owners, is a first step to reducing their power and restoring a sense of equilibrium and peace of heart and mind.

Out of my Mind—Back in five minutes: Staying Present in a Past and Future World

We are at our best when we are able to focus attention in the present moment.  Practical and simple exercises for staying present, cultivating awareness and a sense of mindfulness for what one is engaged in right now, whether in personal or professional contexts.

For Peace of Mind, Resign as General Manager of the Universe

How our sense of self — and many of our most important relationships — are colored by our wrestling match with control: wanting and taking it, loving it and fearing it, and figuring out when the time might come to surrender it.  Where our need for control is not carefully managed, equality elusive and personal and professional progress is slowed.

Meaning-Making

Spirit at Work

Part I: Connecting What We Do with Who We Are and What We Most Value

A two-part series on crafting a life of meaning beginning with identifying important questions: Why am I here?  What is the meaning of my individual life?  Am I born to do something specific?  What do I most value?  What are my goals?  How do I manage the fact of my own mortality? What happens when I die?  The fundamental questions of existence.

With technology and science as optional religions, many now prefer to leave these questions to the philosophers and theologians. Regardless, the questions remain vital and provide unique opportunities for a depth of self-knowledge that lesser questions ignore.  This workshop focuses on how to craft a life of meaning by linking one’s work with one’s life and one’s unique passions. Areas of focus include what it means to leave a legacy, linking work with a larger personal purpose, and the need for mentors and the advantages of mentoring others.

Part II: God Made Water Sweet & People Thirsty: The Life of Desire as Professional Practice

A life of meaning begins with a conversation about the differences between need, want, and desire, and how contemporary Western culture has defined and often confused them. The focus is on clarifying the historic and mythic role of desire as a psychological and spiritual invention for crafting a life of meaning.

My Skin Has Thickened but I Still Want to Feel

As we age, we accumulate life experiences, some of which are unpleasant and may lead to a “hardening.”  A kind of hardness is perhaps necessary for survival but taken to an extreme it can result in cynicism, apathy and a sense that nothing—and no one—really matters, including oneself.  It is vital that professionals work to retain some of the softness that allows a place for beauty, vulnerability and hope.

Spirituality

After ten years of visiting St. Andrew’s Abbey, a Benedictine monastery in Valyermo, CA I became an oblate of that community. For the past 30 years I have lived in an urban hermitage in Winter Park, Florida, seeking to live the spirit of the Benedictine Mothers and Desert Fathers. The following materials proceed from and reflect this rich experience.
The Life of Desire as Spiritual Practice

Desire animates life. The interfacing disciplines of psychology, theology and philosophy point us toward listening for and interpreting desire’s intentions and purposes (the desire for romance, for example, attaches itself to specific persons, environments, things and occasions).  From this perspective, desire serves as a powerful tool for imparting meaning to one’s life.  Historically, some spiritual traditions have forbidden or demonized desire. This course explores desire as a personal force that can be channeled for good or ill.  We will explore how and why desire is an important tool for navigating the spiritual journey

Spiritual & Psychological Themes In Film

In contemporary culture, the burden of storytelling is largely carried by video,
in movies, television and online. We will explore film’s ability to stimulate thought, arouse emotion, encourage dialogue, and challenge the status quo. We will view, discuss, and develop a greater appreciation for the spiritual and psychological themes in film and their meaning for our own personal development.

  1. Redemption and Forgiveness

Stories about redemption and forgiveness are studies in hope. What could be more optimistic than the possibility that everyone and everything has the potential to be redeemed, that forgiveness and renewal could happen at any time, to anyone? The cinema of redemption and forgiveness mirrors our vulnerabilities, tapping the universal longing for a second chance and the freedom it offers. We will view and discuss several films that powerfully portray these two themes.

  1. Music & Musicians

How can a tune travel with us over years and miles and in a flash evoke a memory from a life bathed in music, beginning with the soothing rhythms of the hosting heart in the womb?  In this course we will reflect on music’s psychological and theological foundations as we view film segments that capture the power of music to stir the soul, arouse emotion and invite us to wonder about our own unique relationship to and with music.

Come to Your Senses: Blending the Sensual and the Sacred in Spiritual Practice

The five senses are the primary openings through which all stimuli and information arrives at the brain. In an overstimulated world we often withdraw our senses in order to cope, or they become dull from lack of use. In this course the powerful psychological and spiritual effects of touch, aroma, flavor, color, light and sound are illuminated for the sacred gifts they are, then re-visioned as the means to a life-giving relationship between sensuality and spirituality.

We reconsider the spiritual and psychological implications of the split between the sensual and the sacred and consider alternative perspectives that may offer a deeper experience of one’s own body and of the spiritual dimensions of living in a material world.

The Meaning of Life 101: Ecclesiastes as Paradigm for Developing a Personal Mission

Ecclesiastes is the book within the Abrahamic traditions that squarely faces the question of meaning.  What does meaning mean, and how does one live it?  Is there a difference between meaning and purpose? For the wealthy and powerful author, the purpose of life was to enjoy it as a divine gift. To infuse one’s life with a sense of meaning and/or purpose one must learn to decipher the lessons in an encounter on the street corner, an article in a magazine, a problem at work, a film, a phone call from a friend, a piece of music, or the criticism of a peer.

From Fast Lane to Off-Road: Simplifying Without Complicating

Simplifying is fast becoming a cottage industry, seeking to guide us through the rapids of frenetic contemporary life toward a less complicated way.  What do we mean when we suggest that our lives are out of control?  What specifically do we want when we say we desire a simple life?  What is a simple life?  Is it a possibility?  What Will it Cost Me to Simplify? This hands-on workshop explores these, and other questions related to the myths and realities of the contemporary hunger for simplicity. 

Storytelling: Writing & Telling Your Spiritual Experience

Once upon a time, before psychology made us analysts and philosophy made us critics, people spoke of their spiritual lives as though telling stories. They spoke about events, celebrations and misfortunes as though weaving a tale. How would you go about telling the story of your spiritual life to your friends, children, grandchildren?  What would you include, and leave out?  Taking sacred texts from the world’s great religions as a springboard, and mixing in a little film and fiction, we will plunge into the task of describing our own spiritual geography, both as a way of remembering from where we’ve come, and exploring where we are now on the spiritual journey.

Taking A Spiritual Inventory

Asking a friend if they’ve had an annual physical is an understandable question. Just as regular check-ups are good for the body, regularly scheduling time once a year for a spiritual check-in can be good for the soul, to look back over the past twelve months and inventory the celebrations, questions, joys, concerns, hopes, doubts, and encouragements that have characterized the spiritual journey.  Taking a few hours to simply give thanks for some things, or to gain perspective and mentally re-visit situations and events from the vantage point of the present. Or to forgive, to let go, with less need for revenge and more possibility for renewal.

Slowing Down in a Hurry-Up World

Few things in our world encourage us to seek times of quietness, solitude, and rest. In fact the commercial world would have us believe that silence and solitude are signs of awkwardness, unpopularity, or even failure.  Yet some of our most cherished relationships are those in which we can simply do nothing together and feel fulfilled.  We have no trouble staying busy.  The great spiritual traditions encourage living a life in a rhythm of action and contemplation, to season our activity with times of rest, quietness, solitude, listening for the still, small voice of the Divine, listening for direction, discerning “next steps,” and remembering that we are more than what we do.  This hands-on workshop focuses on the need for a healthy form of self-care and personal renewal in the midst of a busy life.

Great Poems Make Good Prayers

Prayers and poetry both focus on the elements of longing and fulfillment in the human heart, and both serve to infuse the ordinary with a sense of the sacred.  Literature and poetry are employed as tools to survey one’s own spiritual and psychological landscape.  A variety of writers and themes are examined, from the classics to the contemporary.  Specific themes are illustrated with a variety of film clips.

To Hear Is Human, To Listen, Divine: Music and Prayer As Companions on the Spiritual Journey

For thousands of years the Judeo-Christian traditions have used music to evoke feeling and thoughts about the Transcendent. This workshop explores how music can open the mind and heart to an ever-deepening understanding of one’s spiritual and psychological landscape.

Spiritual Themes In Contemporary Film—The Place of Image and Imagination In The Contemplative Life

This workshop demonstrates film’s ability to stimulate thought, encourage dialogue, and expand our awareness of how our spiritual life, and our beliefs and emotions about God impacts our relationships, choices, values and our interaction with the culture.  We will view, discuss, and learn to gain a greater appreciation for the spiritual themes in film and their meaning for today’s society and for our individual spiritual growth.